We are often our own harshest critics and that can get exhausting. Constantly talking down to ourselves can start to tear us down. Furthermore, we tend to not show ourselves the same compassion that we show others. It is easy to get caught up in the rat race of everyday life but we should remember to have love and compassion for ourselves and others. William Shakespeare said it best when he wrote, “love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind. Hence, we should not underestimate the power of our own mind or loving ourselves.
We can achieve this increase in positive energy through a special type of meditation called loving-kindness meditation. General meditative practices require that you keep a clear and empty mind without lingering on any specific thoughts. Loving-kindness meditation, on the other hand, focuses on mentally spreading love and kindness to both yourself and others. This can include family, friends, strangers, and the universe as a whole.
Research has been conducted on the benefits of this type of meditation with promising results in a variety of different areas:
- Chronic Pain: primary research from the Harvard Review of Psychology stated that studies show initial results that loving-kindness meditation is beneficial in treating chronic pain and borderline personality disorder
- Emotion Management: studies have shown that loving-kindness meditation is useful in treating anxiety, anger, the stresses of long-term caregiving, and relationship conflict. Other research shows that this type of meditation can activate parts of the brain that are responsible for empathy. This will help you to increase positivity in your thought processes.
- Decreases implicit biases: research has shown that you can decrease your implicit biases against minorities after only six weeks of practice.
- No risks: you will not lose anything from trying this practice. There are no negative side effects or harm associated with the technique. All it takes is a few minutes out of your day.
How to practice:
- Find a nice quiet place to sit or lay down. Make sure you are comfortable. Sit on a cushion or lay on a mat. Close your eyes, relax your body into the ground, and begin to take deep breaths.
- You can start by loving yourself. Create feelings of warmth and love in the body. Begin to internalize phrases like I am loved. I love myself. I am healthy and whole. I am worthy. May I be protected from harm or evil. I am happy. Make sure to really embrace these sentences. Take them into your heart and body. Feel and believe them deeply.
- Move on to sharing the love with those you are close to. These loved ones can be family and close friends. Imagine the love in your body as a glowing yellow-white light. Focus on your loved ones and envision the light traveling to them. Let the light cover their entire body. Envision them covered in your love. You can internally send positivity their way with phrases like May you be happy. May you be loved. May you be healthy and whole. You are worthy.
- You can repeat this process with strangers. You can send love to the world. Use the same processes as you did on your loved ones but this time, direct the energy to the world as a whole. Wish the world love and kindness for everyone in it. Imagine your glowing light of love enveloping the entire Earth.
- You can also receive love. You can imagine everyone that has ever loved you surrounding you and sharing their love with you. Focus on internalizing and accepting their love into your heart. Let yourself feel full and overflowing with the love from others.
- Go at your own pace. Do what feels right for you in the moment. Take your time and focus on that positive, loving, and kind internal energy.
- Bring your attention back to your breath and whenever you are ready, you can bring awareness back to the body and open your eyes.
If you enjoyed what you read and you are interested in how this practice can help you in your own personal life, contact Greg Murray at greg@adaptiveedgecoaching.com. Greg is an excellent coach and can teach you the benefits of this practice/how best to implement it for you. If you are interested in learning more about meditation, check our out blog series on mediation!